Things change.. a lot.. and people change too. I have learned most changes people make in your life are for the worst.. for you - of it course it may be bettering them in the short or long run but doesn't provide you with any benefit. Now, I'm not reflecting on other's lives.. I'm reflecting on my own and the personal changes it forces ME to deal with (not necessarily make myself)...
In one summer, my life has been, in my opinion, completely turned upside down.. I said in my original March blog it's been a stressful year and couldn't wait to see how summer turned out.... well... I take it back... because I would like to do it all over again, please!
As a result of complete discombobulation, my holidays will be separated and shared; many nights home 'alone'; constant worry; constant stress (I'm pretty sure I have an ulcer); more importantly, I will need to get off my lazy ass and start working out again because, who knew I was a stress-eater?
Most nights I just feel like crying myself to sleep but I'm not a big crier. Unfortunately, even when I'm alone, I don't succumb myself to weakness. It's sick, actually because everyone needs a release, yes? I know this.. I just choose not to level. I think because I know if I do, I won't stop. I don't have time to feel sorry for myself because I have far too much to take care of in the meantime. So, until all of this mess gets cleaned up, I will try not to fall into depression and effectively learn to take care of myself....
